It's been a while since I've blogged. And if you relate the absence of blogging to the possibility that my life turned upside down since school started, then you would be correct.
But something happened tonight that I want to both share and remember.
Our bedtime bible story was the story of baby Moses. We read it, discussed it and then I prayed. I then asked the kids if any of them wanted to pray. Here is what ensued...
From Isaiah:
Dear God,
My daddy tells me all the time that I'm going to do great things. Now I believe him. I'm adopted just like Moses. You saved his life because you had a plan for his life. Because he was going to grow up to do something great for you so you kept him safe and alive. Now I KNOW I'm going to do great things because you saved me and my sister Ruthie. You saved our lives and gave me the best family ever. I love my family God. I love my daddy and my mommy and my brother and my sisters. God, you gave me the bestest family in the whole world. Thank you. Thank you that when my birth mom couldn't take care of me, that you had another mom for me. And thank you so much for my daddy. Thank you that he plays with me and he teaches me all the stuff I don't understand, like rounding, but now I do, because my daddy taught me. And thank you that my mom always makes me food and washes my clothes. God I really, really do love my family. I have the best family...
...
And on and on his prayer went for about 7 minutes...EVERY WORD thanking God for us - his family. For giving him a better life.
When he was done, I couldn't even utter the word Amen because I was too choked up.
I'm not going to lie, it has been a rough few months. But in that prayer, all the tears, the heartache, the frustration that has been piling up in my heart, all of the hard stuff no one talks about in non-adoption circles - ALL of it paled in glimpsing the security he feels in knowing he is wanted, love, provided for and CHOSEN. Not just by us, but by a God that loves him fiercely. All of it paled in comparison to seeing a little boy feel the love of a Heavenly Father. In that moment that Isaiah realized Moses was adopted to be kept safe, his wall of insecurity shattered. He knew he was also chosen to be kept safe until God is ready to fulfill His purpose in Isaiah's life.
A new identity is slowly being bestowed upon Isaiah's head. It hasn't been easy, but with each victory Isaiah has, my character is being refined and my heart is learning what true unconditional love and forgiveness really is.
Thank you Lord, thank you.
